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Question by Kim: These are oldies but so good I had to share…I hope you all like them..Made me crack up on this dreary day.?
> >
> > 1. A man comes into the ER and yells, “My wife’s going to have her baby
> > in the cab!” I grabbed my stuff, rushed out to the cab, lifted the
> > lady’s dress, and began to take off her underwear. Suddenly I noticed
> > that there were several cabs – and I was in the wrong one. Submitted by
> > Dr. Mark MacDonald, San Antonio, TX.
> >
> > 2. At the beginning of my shift I placed a stethoscope on an elderly and
> > slightly deaf female patient’s anterior chest wall. “Big breaths,” I
> > instructed. “Yes, they used to be,” replied the patient. Submitted by
> > Dr. Richard Byrnes, Seattle, WA
> >
> > 3. One day I had to be the bearer of bad news when I told a wife that
> > her husband had died of a massive myocardial infarct. Not more than five
> > minutes later, I heard her reporting to the rest of the family that he
> > had died of a “massive internal fart.” Submitted by Dr. Susan Steinberg,
> > Manitoba, Canada.
> >
> > 4. During a patient’s two-week follow-up appointment with his
> > cardiologist, he informed me, his doctor, that he was having trouble
> > with one of his medications. “Which one?” I asked. “The patch. The nurse
> > told me to put on a new one every six hours and now I’m running out of
> > places to put it!” I had him quickly undress and discovered what I
> > hoped I wouldn’t see. Yes, the man had over fifty patches on his body!
> > Now, the instructions include removal of the old patch before applying a
> > new one. Submitted by Dr. Rebecca St. Clair, Norfolk, VA
> >
> > 5. While acquainting myself with a new elderly patient, I asked, “How
> > long have you been bedridden?” After a look of complete confusion she
> > answered…”Why, not for about twenty years – when my husband was
> > alive.” Submitted by Dr. Steven Swanson, Corvallis, OR
> >
> > 6. I was caring for a woman and asked, “So how’s your breakfast this
> > morning?” “It’s very good, except for the Kentucky Jelly. I can’t seem
> > to get used to the taste” the patient replied. I then asked to see the
> > jelly and the woman produced a foil packet labeled “KY Jelly.” Submitted
> > by Dr. Leonard Kransdorf, Detroit, MI
> >
> > 7. A nurse was on duty in the Emergency Room, when a young woman with
> > purple hair styled into a punk rocker Mohawk, sporting a variety of
> > tattoos, and wearing strange clothing, entered. It was quickly
> > determined that the patient had acute appendicitis, so she was scheduled
> > for immediate surgery. When she was completely disrobed on the
> > operating table, the staff noticed that her pubic hair had been dyed
> > green, and above it there
> > was a tattoo that read, “Keep off the grass.” Once the surgery was
> > completed, the surgeon wrote a short note on the patient’s dressing,
> > which said, “Sorry, had to mow the lawn.” Submitted by RN no name
> >
> > AND FINALLY!!!…………….
> >
> > 8. As a new, young MD doing his residency in OB, I was quite embarrassed
> > when performing female pelvic exams. To cover my embarrassment I had
> > unconsciously formed a habit of whistling softly. The middle-aged lady
> > upon whom I was performing this exam suddenly burst out laughing and
> > further embarrassing me. I looked up from my work and sheepishly said,
> > “I’m sorry. Was I tickling you?” She replied, “No doctor, but the song
> > you were whistling was, “I wish I was an Oscar Meyer Wiener”. Doctor
> > wouldn’t
> > submit his name………..

Best answer:

Answer by Rita P
loved them all. they were sooo funny

Give your answer to this question below!

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STC 33301 Green Ecomposter

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www.dexknows.com Serving the Olympia area, Olympic Landscape and Maintenance offers creative landscape services to homeowners and commercial properties. We offer complete design and construction, as well as spring installations and maintenance. For all your landscaping needs, contact Olympic Landscape and Maintenance. We’re ready to make your lawn look the way you want it to.

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Question by Just Sellin: Has anybody used liquid lawn aeration?
About 2 months ago I laid a new sod yard. I tilled the entire yard about 6-8 inches deep to loosen the soil to give the new sod roots a good start. Well, the yard isn’t doing so good even after continued watering. I called in a lawn care company and they have treated the lawn with fertilizers and premergers (for the weeds growing between the sod). They recommend lawn aeration and overseeding this fall which is what I plan to do. I have found a few companies that offer a liquid aeration that is supposed to be better that traditional methods such as spike or core aeration. Has anyone had any experience with this type of aeration? Aerify! and LazyMan™ Liquid Soil Aerator are two of the companies. Any help would be greatly appreciated.

Best answer:

Answer by EDWYN
You should put liquid lawn aeration when you first put sod you have to let the roots stick to the ground

Give your answer to this question below!

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Gilmour RM30 20-Inch Reel Mower with Grass Catcher

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• Height adjusts from 1- to 3-Inch easily
• Large loop handle with comfort grip

UX-B20 Ink Jet Plain Paper Fax/Copier/Phone

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I recruit 3 new members for my team, although I probably won’t keep Roselia in it. I’ll say, Roselia was a suprise for me since I thought this hack was a pretty true remake to the original Gold and Silver versions, however I’m probably going to just end up using it as a scapegoat for poison status until I find better Grass-types to fill my ranks, also I’m thinking about getting rid of the random trainer battles…mostly because I’m running out of pokemon music. XD Oh yes, I suppose beating Falkner was an accomplishment too. (We all knew he was going down though didn’t we?)

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Question by Chingas Magee’s Crusty Pete: What is the best way to treat my Fairy ring lawn disease?
I have a half moon shaped dead spot in my lawn. It is called a fairy ring. I have tried to treat it, but can’t get rid of it. Any ideas?

Best answer:

Answer by Exodus
that’s not a fairy ring. a fairy ring is a clump of mushrooms that teenagers keep trying to steal so they can eat. a dead spot on your lawn, plant something else there. something hearty enough to grow there.

What do you think? Answer below!

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Question by Citysides: can someone give me some information about the fungal lawn disease called Brown Patch?
I had my lawn tested and I was told it had “Brown Patch” I am looking for information on how the disease spreads and if it lives in the soil or news living tissue to thrive.
It IS a fungus…I had my soil tested and I was told it was the fungus called Rhizoctonia solani. It has nothing to do with grubs.
This question is for Jazzmaninica2003 regarding Rootshield. Thank you so much for all your helpful advice. I have some questions regarding the Rootshield product you mentioned. Someone else also recommended this product, so I have been thinking about using it for awhile. However, I live in zone 6 and have cool season grasses…I was wondering if the beneficial fungus would survive the cold winters. If so, I was wondering how much product I would have to purchase to cover 4000 square feet of lawn?

Best answer:

Answer by goodyisback2010
yeah I want some brown patch

Know better? Leave your own answer in the comments!

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Lawn aeration is the secret weapon in making your lawn healthy. Aeration involves making holes in the lawn either by pushing a rod into it or by “coring”, extracting a plug of soil. By aerating your lawn you provide the following benefits to your lawn and its root system: Oxygen gets to the roots and the soil allowing it to “breathe” Organic fertilizers and nutrients get access to the root system Water is able to better soak the soil and reach the root system Helps to break up thatch Tight, compacted soil is loosened up allowing the root system to grow